Adjusting

We are working hard to figure out how best to overcome the language barrier. We have Jubilee going to school with the rest of the crew. On one level she loves it. She likes being with the other children and making new friends. But it is all in English.

She speaks English well, and we haven't had too much trouble communicating. I have discovered that she smiles and nods frequently whether she understands me or not. I will ask a question that should be yes or no, in such a way that she should give a negative answer and I almost always get a smile and nod. I tried to explain to her that shrugging will let me and her teachers know that she doesn't understand and we will try to explain it differently. I think sometimes she just doesn't want to mess with trying to figure it out. I don't blame her, it is a lot to learn.

I had a brainstorming session with a friend this week that gave me some ideas. We decided that it would be really hard to sound out words that you don't know. How can you know if you are sounding it out correctly if you don't even know what it is. I have started rounding up picture dictionaries, and word books for toddlers. The Richard Scary books that drove me crazy when my kids were two and wanted to read them all the time are suddenly becoming very useful. I also found the PBS shows helpful while we were stuck in the hospital. I need to spend a lot of time just building her vocabulary and explaining what things are. We bought sticky notes and are labeling everything in the house so that she can see the words for all of the things we talk about everyday. I told her she could write the Amharic word underneath the English so we could learn them too.

One of her teachers even learned a few Amharic phrases to say to her at school. She was very pleased by this gracious gesture. She asked me if her husband was Habesha. I think it was helpful for her to know that we do realize how hard this is for her.

I can't even imagine how hard it would be to make the changes she is making. She told me that she was happy to stay in Ethiopia. I think she thought she would not be adopted. That has to be a hard thing to work through as well. Of course then she smiles and says "it's okay." Unbelievable. She has a special spirit to be able to just accept what is brought her way and to roll with it. I have a lot to learn from her. She loves to be around her big sisters, and she has a friend from AHOPE that she calls regularly. I am very thankful for her friends and the way that they encourage her. I have faith that this will get easier for her as she becomes more comfortable in this culture. The whole idea of a new culture is something that I think about a lot. What is she gaining vs. what she is losing. She definitely has much to grieve over. That doesn't seem to be what she prefers to do. She gets down, but picks herself up very quickly.

The challenges with older children are complex, but the kids are really wonderful. I am loving this journey and I have much hope for her future.



Homework, she loves it!