Cleaning House

How different the world looks after I have spent three hours home working all by myself.  Last night I was sure that my life had taken off without me, and it was not possible to ever vacuum my floors again.  School had started and I was still working dawn until, well, dawn again and not making any headway.  I still have one child in need of shoes, but I can see the floor in my bedroom and I think my family has enough food to last until I get home. 

I was sitting at the table working on homework, trying to figure out where to find shoes for the child without any, looking at the mess of clothes and paper all over my living room, when the still small voice broke through all the clamor.  Whose standard was I trying to meet?  Was the world going to come to an end if my daughter gets a pink slip on Friday for wearing athletic shoes?  So what, if my child gets a C on this paper?  I was reminded in that instant that all of these results are up to God.  No amount of finagling on my part will change what God is working out in my life.

Ultimately I had missed the mark before any of my kids were out of bed.  I had decided I would sit down and read my Bible once everyone was off to school.  It was a bad  plan.  I didn't get back home before I had to pick up the kindergartners and then life crowded in.  I got my priorities out of order, and the rest of the day slid into disarray.  This morning I was determined to start my day with God's Word and prayer.  I had to hunt down my Bible which had mysteriously wandered down to Mads' room.  But I got it read and committed my day, and all its results to God.  So far the to do list is clearing quickly.

My temptation  when things start clipping along nicely is to think, "look at me, Miss got it all together..."  Why do I do that?  It is like my kids who can't find their shoes.  I find them and put them back in their closet.  They come running in and announce that they have found their shoes!  Isn't it amazing?  I chuckle and say, "Yes, it's miraculous."  God pulls things together in my life, and all of sudden I think I've done a miracle.  Vanity, vanity, all is vanity.  It is God that keeps me from being a complete disaster.  He gives my children gifts, of organization, cheerfulness, intelligence, wisdom, and friendliness.  I didn't do it.  I believe that He is God, and that He gives every good and perfect gift, even the ones I don't want.  He does it for His own glory, not so that I can look like super Mom.  I am thankful that He takes care of me and my family even when I think I did it by myself.

The first thing I am going to clean in the house from now on, is my brain.  I'm going to get up and thank God.  I'm going to seek Him and let Him give me the gifts I need for the day.  The vacuuming can wait until God is ready for me to see that even the dirt on my floor will be taken care of when I seek His kingdom first.