The Blessing of Adoption

So I did start a little family blog, over at wordpress.  If you are interested in what the fam and I are up to, feel free to pop over there and read whatever we put up.  It will be very personal to us, and very random in a way that we find comfortable.

I felt badly saying that adoption issues are not where my focus is lately.  That is really not true.  Adoption is one avenue of child rearing, which is only a beginning.  You adopt a child, like you give birth to a child.  There are all kinds of time consuming, emotional processes that go into both.  At the end of that process you have a new person living in your home, and there the real adventure begins.

My thoughts on adoption these days are in the realm of how to adjust expectations.  How to motivate these little people to help them reach their fullest potential.  How to help them love to work.  Mundane things like that, that pertain to any child no matter how they got into your home.  I am trying to wrap my head around how much information can be packed in one head in one year.  How to keep my children feeling good about their progress, even if it is not what others expect of them.  I'm just out here raising children to the glory of God.  The issues that we are dealing with are pretty much everyday household issues, with an added layer of complexity.

I will say that I am trying very hard to be thankful for the challenges that these children bring with them.  Early on in our adoption process we contacted a family that had had some challenges in their adoption journey.  I thought their story had turned out quite well, and when I asked them about it they admitted that it had.  Their focus, however was on the challenges and how hard they had been.  They couldn't see the blessings that had come with it.  They had let it become bitter in their lives instead of joyful.  It was a very good cautionary tale for us.  Even on my worst day I want to see the blessing of having two more lovely children in my life.

It is an awesome responsibility to take children through adoption.  These children now have two sets of parents expecting great things from them.  I told Martha that I expect the same things from her that I expect from all my other children.  I know she has had a tougher start then they have, but I also know that God knew she could handle it.  I warned her that I was going to push her, because I love her and see how much potential she has.  I know that I am asking her to do a hard job, but I also know she has the tenacity to do it.  It is hard for both of us.  She has to play the game, but I have to coach it well.  It takes a lot of planning, praying, talking, watching, reading, and faith.  I don't want to let their families in Ethiopia down.  They are expecting these kids to do great things, and they have trusted me to see to it that it gets done.  Yes, it is hard.  It is not what I thought I would be doing at this stage of my life.  It is what God has given me to do, and I have to rise to the occasion, just like they do.

People will occasionally ask if we are done adopting.  For now, I would emphatically say "yes!"  But really, who knows?  I feel like I am running at maximum capacity these days, and I need to make sure I am taking care of the people that already live here.  Will that always be the case?  I can't tell.  I hope that someday I will have the time and energy to care for children in need in some capacity.  Maybe it would be foster care, maybe respite for foster parents, maybe another adoption, maybe just grandchildren.  I will leave it in God's hands, and be willing to take whatever he brings.