that everyday is blissful. Nes does have at least one good meltdown every day. Usually having to do with giving up something up that he wants. Today it was the Wii remote. We are still getting to know each other, so I am trying to weigh how much to sit with him and how much to let him vent on his own. Some days I think I get in his space too much, and some days not enough. He is patient with me. He shrugs me off if he isn't ready, he takes a couple of steps back. I try to reign him in if he seems like he is getting beyond what he can pull back. He does tell me he loves me even through his tears at times, so I know that I haven't totally lost him. Telling me he loves me at all after only three and a half weeks is pretty amazing.
Setting boundaries, and establishing family rules is challenging, even for the members that were born here. He responds well given enough time. This morning I left him sitting on his bed, still not ready to make eye contact. A few minutes later, I heard "mommy". I went to his room. He gave me a big smile. I said "I love you", he said "I love you". He went back downstairs and is playing with his siblings. He is very resilient. I know he has a lot to work through, and these lessons are not easy for any of us. It is good for the rest of the family to remember to let love cover it, especially where their little brother is concerned. Is having a turn on the Wii worth sending your brother into a tantrum. I don't think so.
3 comments:
That is so precious. It's got to be so hard to go through this transition. But he sounds like he is doing well! When did he start calling you Mommy and was it easy for him?
He started calling me Mommy right away. He called Rick Umpapa, which means uncle, and Brooke Auntie which is Hey, you! I think Mommy was really lady that is in charge. We are working on Daddy, and Mommy as actual parents.
So true, "let love cover it". Yeah I can't even begin to imagine what goes through these little guys' heads but in time it all will be good. I think the no eye contact is so common and also the head nod when they don't want to say yes or no. I finally got Biruk to start looking at me after over 2 months over teaching and being with me. BTW, the AHOPE t-shirt looks great on him, I have got to get some for my little ones.
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