Several people have commented on my post about seeing adoption from Jubilee's perspective. I didn't want to give anyone the impression that things are going badly, or that this is not what I was expecting. Things are actually going surprisingly well. I had read enough books, blogs, email discussions to know that adopting older children can ramp up the drama level in any life. I was prepared for things to be much bumpier than they have been.
Jubilee loves to spend time with her older sisters, and is being very patient with her younger ones. Much more patient than they are with each other. She does not appreciate it when they join us for reading time and answer the questions for her. But she plays with them, and helps them when they need it. Their interaction is quite interesting actually. She was asking me about when she can visit Ethiopia next. Nes said he didn't want to visit Ethiopia. She got quite upset and told him that he should because his mother misses him. He looked sort of puzzled since I am the person that he thinks of as his mother. Jubilee met his mom, and understood what she was telling me about wanting to see Nes before she dies. Jubilee feels much more strongly about this than Nes does at this point in life.
I do realize that her perspective will change as she get older, and lives here longer. For now she can only think about life one day at a time. I have asked her about her dreams. What she would like to do when she grows up. She doesn't seem to have a concept of being grown up. Her only vision for the future right now is to go back to Ethiopia. She wants very much to see her friends, and to find families for them. She told me that she wants to take their pictures and find families that will bring them to America. She is also saving her allowance to send back to AHOPE. She is very loyal to her "family" in Ethiopia. I hope that someday she will be that loyal to us, and that we will be as loyal to her family there as well.
Her English is getting better every day. She is asking me what things mean. She is very concrete in her thinking, so the abstract thoughts are hard to translate. She is getting there though. I am also trying to impress upon her the desire to learn, and to value education. I don't think she cared much about learning in Ethiopia. I don't think she thought it would make a difference in her life. I am not sure yet that she sees that she has a long life ahead of her. Death is a very real concept to her. She has known so many people, many of them children that have died. She knows that the virus she has has killed many people around her. I don't think she takes a long life for granted.
Our days are mostly sunny with times of overcast. She grieves the loss of her friends, and things that are familiar. She gets tired quickly trying to cram so many new things into her brain. I try to give her frequent breaks to recharge. We have spring break coming up which will be a good time to get away as a family and spend time together. I'm sure we will have tense moments, but I am hoping that it will be a good time for her to get to know us better. She will also get to visit with two very special friends from AHOPE. I know that they will be a great encouragement to her.
Thank you to all of you who commented on the post. I appreciate the encouragement and the prayers. We are doing very well, and I know that things will get better as we get to know each other better. Jubilee is an amazing girl, and I know that God has great things in store for her. I am so very thankful for all that she is teaching me, and the richness she is bringing to us all.
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