Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Getting out of my head

I spend a lot of time thinking about what I want my life to look like.  Big picture stuff, like where do I want to live, what do I want to spend the bulk of my time doing, what do I want my kids to feel is important.  It always comes back to loving God, and following Him.  That leaves a very wide variety of things that I can choose, and I often wonder what is the right thing for me and my house.  I have to remind myself that it is Rick's house, and he has to be in the lead, especially on the big decisions.  I need to be in prayer constantly to see with eyes of faith.

I'm finding myself much more drawn to sports with my kids than I thought I would.  They have so many opportunities and I want them to dive into them all.  I was watching parents at the track meet yesterday and some of them were REALLY into it.  Their kids were very gifted, and their parents were obviously very supportive, but I began to wonder if that is what I want to do.  I want my kids to do well, and if it would help them as adults, even better, but is that what their Father wants for them?  It is easy to get sucked into the competition, the camaraderie, and the fun, but at what point does it go from good clean fun to obsession?

I have let hospitality slide lately.  There are many excuses that I could give.  My house has issues, my kids require more attention than I can give, our schedules are conflicting enough that finding an evening when we are home is tough.  Hospitality is not really an optional thing however.  God commands us to be hospitable.  Honestly I have not trained my children well in being hospitable and that is also part of the problem.  They don't want to pitch in and do the work, which just adds to the burden.  They don't see it as a joy, mostly because I don't lead them in that direction.

I was reading Titus yesterday, and the command to women is so shockingly simple: be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things-...love your husbands and children, be discreet, homemakers, good, obedient to your own husband.  Why do I find that so hard to figure out?  Do I believe that if I do these simple things I will be satisfied in the Lord, and that my children will do well in the land?  That is the work of God, believing what He says.  I need to get out of my head, and believe.  Obey my husband, love my kids, and mind my own business, how hard is that?

Today I am thankful for my husband, God's Word, that sooths troubled souls, like mine and Jubilee's, music, coffee, friendship, blue skies, sun puddles, cat naps, prayer, peaceful afternoons, bicycles, laughter, dimples, forgiveness, and new life.

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