Today's sermon was on the story of David and Bathsheba. I had been reading Eugene Peterson's book on the life of David. I've also been wrestling a lot with the role of women in the world and what God is asking of us. I distinctly remember sitting in church when it hit me that God is calling us to follow Christ. The church I was attending at the time had a big push to become leaders. They were always asking us who we were leading. I once told one of the pastors that I'm not a leader, I'm a follower. By nature I prefer following, but also I do believe I am called to be a follower. I follow Jesus. So sitting in that service I was literally knocked down by the realization that some of us will be slaughtered like the innocent lamb. Some of us will be trampled by those in power. Some of us will be raped and murdered and torn apart in the violence that is very present in this world. We are not main characters. We are beloved children. This is God's created world, but evil is present here. I don't understand how people live believing that the end here is the end of all things. I can only hope in a life that continues after the final chapters of earth have been lived out. I believe in a savior that was innocently murdered by a cruel mob that believed they were doing the right thing. I still see mobs forming to do "the will of God" in some very ugly situations. Once again, these are men who believe they are gods, not God that created them. God is good, and the end of our stories here is not the end of our life in Christ.
My musings here are mine alone. These are the thoughts that roll in my mind. I'm not trying to make them all coherent now. This is the dumping season, so I'm just throwing them out. I am not advocating for others to believe what I believe (although if you want to believe that God is good, I strongly encourage that). My Christian "doctrine" has grown over time. It grows like a garden. Sometimes it needs pruning or weeding or watering. I find some things doing well, and some things need to be plucked out. I definitely need other gardeners to assist me to keep it healthy. If you don't agree with me, that's great, we will probably have some very interesting conversations. If you do agree with me, well cool, but I may change my mind down the road, so if our agreement is the only thing you like about me this may be a short fellowship.
Back to David and Bathsheba. David is a very human man. God obviously thought very highly of him. and gave him some mind blowing promises. The great things that happened in his life are all the things God did through him. When David got comfortable and started thinking his thoughts were more profitable than God's instructions he got muddled in a hurry. Bathsheba was probably very similar. She was a woman, living in proximity to a mighty king. One of the great things about the Bible is that it leaves a lot of things unsaid. God is VERY specific in some places, like to the point of eyes glazing over, but He is very vague in others. I think He leaves a lot of room for interpretation on purpose. We have to look to Him for wisdom. His word is timeless, transcending cultures and locations. The interpretation I have been most familiar with is the: David should have been at war, Bathsheba was out tempting him, he gave in to temptation = men should be working and women shouldn't be tempting. That's very condensed but probably familiar. I don't hold to that interpretation. I don't know why David was at home, the Bible doesn't say. David had plenty of other women to meet his needs, so taking Bathsheba was obviously taking something that didn't belong to him. Bathsheba's part is all up for interpretation, but given her gender and the culture she lived in she had very limited options. Based on what we know from other passages and how she lived as David's wife, she was a beautiful, intelligent woman who understood how this world works. She paid dearly in her life for the sins David committed against her. In many ways she was a victim, but I don't see her living the rest of her life in that identity. She lives well considering what she had been given. As a woman it is difficult to see how women often carry a heavy burden due to men's sin. And yes, we often get blamed in some circles for having somehow brought it on ourselves just by being women. I don't believe that is how God sees it. He knows our weakness. He gives us special strength to endure and to love. He is the rewarder of our souls and I trust Him to walk with me. As a pilgrim it is important for me to remember that my relationship with God is personal. What he does in my life is mine. He works differently with others. I can learn from other people's stories, but if I let them trip me up, it's because I'm coveting or deflecting. If God calls me to listen to stories of men taking advantage of young girls and pastors coming to the defense of the young man over and over again, I will do it trusting Him to make all things right. If God calls my friend to write books and speak all over the country, I will congratulate her and help at home if I can. If God calls another friend to own businesses and travel the world, I will keep her in my prayers and be a listening ear. If God calls another friend to walk with chronic pain and serve others in difficult circumstances I will remember her in my prayers and call her to make sure she is doing ok. I'm not their judges, I am their sister in Christ. We all fail. We all keep moving on. We all age. We all are tempted. We all are human.
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